Monday, March 29, 2010

What Helps You to Cope? (Contains Graphic Content)

Just finished lunch. Which means back to the resumes and cold calling.

Do you still have problems with body memory? The sources that we trust all say that it's normal for it to come out. But it's frustrating when you feel like you have to constantly fight off some psycho rapist. If you don't, you feel like a piece of meat and totally empty.

For some reason, in that scenario it's like it get worse and worse. And despite all that NOBODY is going to help you. One minute these others might say, oh we care about you, you matter to us, etc. But when push comes to shove, it's f**k this guy survivor s**t. YOU fix it. We have better things to do with our time. Then they laugh and they walk away.

How are you supposed to react to THAT?

The answer? You have to fight back. Even if it feels like you're going to black out. You can't just roll over and die. It's terrifying, but what else can you do? It seems like not all but much of the world wants things nice and neat. You say this soundbite, people react with the appropriate response. And then you're put into a niche that allows everyone to go home early.

It's kind of like when the President speaks before Congress. He speaks, they stand and applaud. They sit. He speaks. Repeat the cycle. Almost like robots in a way.

Do you ever get the feeling that maybe someone else blames you if you don't fit their nice little niche? What are you supposed to say then? Well sorry if I totally f****d up your day by being stupid enough to get repeatedly raped?

Protection and survival come first. Set your boundaries. And, you're not responsible for what others do and say. Do you really have to be plugged into everything 24/7? If they say they want nothing to do with you, fine. Go elsewhere. But you can't have it both ways. One minute you care about me. Then the next it's f**k off. It doesn't work like that.

Have a nice Monday.

NOTE: As much as possible, we try to never intentionally trigger anyone in this blog. But at times the content can be hardcore to be able to get our message out. Hope you understand.

No comments: