Monday, February 28, 2011

Key Questions for You

It's been a while since we talked about herbal supplements and other tools that might help you to keep your balance. Let's catch up:

Does too much acidic stuff in your diet make symptoms worse?
Does caffeine help you or hurt you?
Can too much salt damage your nervous system?
Does aloe help you to feel more centered?
How much sugar is too much?
Can withdrawl from chemicals in your diet damage your system?
What's the most helpful herbal supplement for you?
Can chemicals in your environment make your symptoms worse?

We've tried to find out answers to these online in various studies. But so far no luck.

Post your comments on these.

Friday, February 25, 2011

It is Friday

It's Friday. Also, the triggering stuff is still there, and seems to be spreading. However, we'll stick to our rule of not specifically listing it all. Listing it all here will only add to our collective stress level.

How's your reintergration these days? For some, it never happens. For others, it happens in stages. But for everyone that we've ever talked to, it's always extremely painful. That's what happened in our case.

On the other hand, every case is different. Which means you have to decide what's best for you.

The other tough part right now is when flashbacks and the full reality of how horrible PTSD can be hits. Does this still happen to you? We're not on any meds. No booze. No more poisoning ourselves with tons of chemicals in junk food. All good things.

Which means going back to the idea of stages and protection.

Cover your steps online. Leave no obvious clues to connect that someone could use to out you. Just make a list of stuff that a hacker could potentially do and then create a block for each one.

Stay one step ahead.

Thursday, February 24, 2011

We're on Hold

How's your Thursday/early Friday looking? Here, talk about multitasking. We're on hold on the food stamps line as we write, surf and have our afternoon snack. It's amazing how much you can get done while on hold.

Are you coping with your symptoms these days? Dissociating and some rare adrenalin surges still happen. Maybe part of it is still detoxifying from all of the chemicals we used to use. Tiny amounts of sugar and caffeine seem to be ok if you mix that with lots of water.

What's the worst symptom right now (if there is such a thing)? Anger still comes out and is hard to deal with. Do you feel like when you do get it out you're this close to blacking out? We do. We feel like we're literally going to snap in two. Now, deal with that and everything else you have to do.

Keep in mind that everyone heals at different rates. In addition, you have to protect yourself. Why? Because all trauma survivors can only take so much. You didn't ask to go thru hell because of something that's not your fault. This means that yes you are entitled to respect.

Just our opinion. Do everything you can to protect yourself. This also means protecting yourself from triggering things (people, places and more). Do what's best for you.

47 minutes on hold and counting....

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Fighting Hard to Keep Our Positive Balance

How's your day? Here, it's cover a lot of bases.

We're waiting to talk to an attorney about pressure(commit SSI fraud) from the "parents" in exchange for money. Is this illegal? We want to protect ourselves as much as possible both legally and financially. Another reason is that people (especially trauma survivors) can only take so much. You have to protect your physical and mental health. Which means we're documenting as much as possible.

Are you taking things in tiny segments like we are? In addition to that, we're trying to be as healthy as possible. Our tolerance for acidic foods is really low. Have you checked the sugar content in a bottle or can of soda? It varies from 40 to 65 grams. Doesn't this count as "toxic"? Also, what does "natural ingredients mean"? You ask in a store, and they don't know. You ask the corporate head office and they say thanks for writing. Hello?

At times, we've thought about suicide. But, what stops us from doing it? Not giving them the satisfaction, that's what.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Use All of Your Sources

How's your Thursday/Friday? Staying in tonight and catching up on a lot.

We went for our Aid to Needy Families interview earlier today. Didn't get that. But, we did get the maximum monthly amount of food stamps assistance.

Now, the next thing is protecting ourselves at all costs. The "parents" still think that we have a "disability" that justifies getting Supplemental Income. We still have mild PTSD which is not a disability. Unfortunately, they could care less what we think.

This means that if push comes to shove and they say, ok, no more financial help, we want to have backups to protect ourselves. We're not going to destroy our life just to get a bully's temporary money. It means as limited contact as possible with them.

As for other stuff, we're screening as much as possible. Some job hunting stuff we have to look at. But other stuff we want no part of. We won't mention it all here and risk triggering everybody.

How are you coping? Despair and dissociating are still problems for us. You have to fight back to keep your balance. If you don't, you'll just fall apart. You feel like an empty shell and wonder, what's the point?

Now, will we actually off ourselves? No. However, in our opinion, it's important to face everything head on as best you can.

We're getting better at prioritizing. Like they say, information and options mean more power. Protect yourself at all costs.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

It's a Global Thing

Greetings to our growing worldwide audience. Pick a place and we're there:

Vancouver B.C.
Tel Aviv
Mountain View, CA.

Link us everywhere you can, because word of mouth really does work.

No word today on one social service rent/utility help program. We have a phone interview on Thursday for the other one. Another friend told us earlier today that they couldn't help us out temporarily with rent if necessary. We said that's ok. The last thing we want to do is add to your stress. At this point, we have no other sources that could help ongoing with these.

There's lots of anger and at times despair. The ulgy truth in our case:

We told the "parents" about being raped. We told the truth and they chose to do nothing. In many states, it's possible to be prosecuted for failing to report a sick crime like this.

No comfort in any way. No apologies. Nothing.

We've decided that it's not worth it to be treated like shit by a bully just to get their temporary money. We're taking things in 30 second segments.

How do you deal with your symptoms? Do you feel like someone (or anyone) will acknowledge that you're a rape survivor and you exist? Do you still have flashbacks and physical pain? Do you carry a weapon or keep one by your bed just in case?

There's some news right now about rape cases in the military (both men and women survivors). Again, both men and women. Both deserve to be heard. Also, a reporter in Egypt was sexually assaulted. We hope everything will work out for all of these people.

But, we also hope that all of them will be given the respect they deserve to be heard and then to hopefully start to heal.

30% of the population in the States has some form of PTSD. This is a fact and it's not going to go away. No matter how you spin it or where you hide it in the back of some "official govt. study".

Ignoring trama only makes it worse.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Keeping Your Balance

How's your weekend? Here, we're fighting hard to keep our balance. It's still a matter of covering lots of bases, just in case one doesn't work.

It's also a matter of protecting yourself at all costs. It's not worth it to be treated like shit (just so you can get someone's offer of money to pay your rent). We have mild PTSD that's taken years to get to this point. This means that we're NOT going to literally destroy our life just to satisfy some bullies who have money.

If you can't give us the basic human respect of being a rape survivor, then to hell with you.

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The Latest

Sorry to be away for a while. We've been busy covering bases and trying to keep our positive focus.

How are your symptoms these days? We're still sticking to 30 seconds at a time. But also, paying attention to the effects of things on you and your what your body's saying. Despair, some physical pain and anger are still hard to deal with. However, we've decided to face all of this head on. We didn't for a long time, which only made symptoms worse. Now, we're facing it.

Something else is coming soon. Give us a little more time to set everything up. We have a big favour to ask. We hope you can help out.