Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Getting Bombarded From All Sides (Contains Graphic Content)

How was your day? Got a big mix done. Car repairs that were cheaper than we thought.
Then, more in job hunting.

But also, a rough day with symptoms. Do any of these affect you?:

Physical pain of being raped.
Lucid dreams
A stuck fight-or-flight mechanism
Screaming and fighting to not get raped, black out. Or die
Feeling terrified when the whole world laughs in your face
Always having the feeling of, does anybody care?
Feeling like you have to keep a weapon in every room you're in to feel safe
Violent lucid dreams of being killed in a perfectly safe situation
No matter how bad it gets, you have to fight back. Or die.
Nobody is going to help you. Admit that you exist. Or, reassure you in any way.
Because they're afraid of getting raped too?
Getting the impression that many in positions of (power?) in rape crisis centers just say, this is the status quo. If we cause trouble, we get no govt. grants. So just shut up.
We still get hundreds of physical pain flashbacks every day.
Do you scream and fight to not black out?
Do you feel like you can trust anyone?

That's enough for tonight.

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