Keep Your Self Control (High Trigger Day)

Lots of triggers everywhere you look. We're still sticking to our media fast. And, we have no idea how long it's going to go on.

The only thing that matters is protection. For whatever reason, it feels like almost everything's a threat. You constantly have to fight back or fall apart. And do everything else at the same time.

How do you keep going without pasing out from exhaustion?

Post your comments.

It's All in the Mix (Today is a Medium Trigger Day)

How are you coping these days? Here, we're still having bad days with dissociating and really horrible anger. We won't buy a gun and go on a rampage or anything. But, you feel at times like you're this close to just beating the shit out of everybody who even looks at you the wrong way.

What helps us to cope? One thing is a better ph balance. Ideally, you want to have a 70/30 ratio (akaline/acidic) in your diet. Too much acidic stuff makes it hard to concentrate. Plus it can potentially aggrevate a lot of conditions.

If we get the balance right, then we feel like we can actually sit still and focus for a while on something. It's still a battle when you try to do that and then you get assaulted by a billion triggers all at once.

Why do these come out? We're not sure. Our last therapist says that it's the severity of the PTSD in our case. And it has to be worked thru in the most non-threatening way possible.

Another thing to consider? If you drink lots of sugar or caffeine, that's depleting your body of chi and water. Which means you have to drink even more water to replace that.

Is this another global marketing scheme from the giant bottled water firms? Maybe.

The point is more awareness of what you do. Not to never have any fun at all. Just be aware of what you're doing. And the effect(s) it has on you.

Today is a High Trigger Day

It's Monday. And, the Trigger Index is really high today. Be very careful as you work your way around online.

What would really be helpful? Some new software that would scan something BEFORE you deal with it. And give you a total of the number of triggers in it. If Steve Jobs is so awesome, how come he hasn't done THAT yet?

At times, do you feel like you're being bombarded with stimulus? Do you have trouble knowing where you are? What's real and what isn't? We still have periods where we feel like we're going to black out. You can do lots of healthy things (diet, exercise and more). But other than those, what happns when you're this close to snapping?

The fear and despair are there. But you can't just sit back and "go with your feelings" (in our opinion). If that helps you, fine. But just for us, it's never worked.

Trust your intuition. If you really think something's not worth it, then don't look (unless you have to). Do you really want to have to deal with then maybe dissociating for hours afterwards to try and get your balance back? Stay away from it.

There are other things that you can do.

Sunny and a High Trigger Index

Enjoying your day? Here, high 90's and even higher humidity. But, it's better than snow.

How are your symptoms these days? How do people treat dealing with trauma in your part of the world? Are they fairly open-minded? Or, is there a stupid taboo about dealing with your health (both physical and mental)?

Because really, that's what it is. Almost every time, when someone says "mental health", do they EVER talk about the physical effects of it? Most of the time, no. It's take your meds and we'll put you into a nice neat box.

In our case, we're on a new media fast. Right now, only music or something in a foreign language is ok. Part of the idea is to have some stimulus to focus on. This way it helps you to hopefully not dissociate.

If you want to, try this as well. And see how you do.

But, reading this blog is always ok.

Have a nice day.

You Are What You Eat, Drink, Watch, Read, and Listen to

Today is a medium trigger day. Our sugestion? Stay away as much as possible from all of them.

It's not just content. But content AND other things (locations, people and more). Do you REALLY have to go into this place? If not, think of the other possibilities. If you have to find something, odds are you can find it online. And if it's not a threat to your overall balance, then stay home. Or, take your laptop with you and wi-fi it as you enjoy your snack for the day.

For trauma survivors, think of information as regulated stimulus. At work, maybe that's difficult to accomplish. Elsewhere, control it to your advantage.

There are a million different tools out there that you can use. All of them would love to have us mention their names on a global platform and get tons of free publicity (and then massive profits resulting from said publicity). Not today.

Despite the govt. monitoring everything, the world will keep getting more connected. And, more and more frustrated progressive people are building their own networks to get their message out.

Use your tools creatively to get your content out. Also, bypass the silly "Cryptome vs. Wikileaks vs. Wayne Madsen Reports Turf Wars" rubbish. Just concentrate on your content and promotion.

As for us, symptoms are still there. At the end of the day we're totally wiped out from fighting to not snap or black out. Then again, what other choice do you have?

It Really is Early on Friday (Moderate Trigger Day)

4:53 a.m. Can't go back to sleep. We might as well ease into an early start.

Thanks for the growing global support. And hi to our readers in Canada, San Francisco, New York City, London and elsewhere. You know who you are. We don't. But that's ok.

Today might be another one of those we-know-everything-that's-going-to-happen days. Lots of "in-depth analysis" of the issues. But they still keep happening.

How do you cope in the morning? Do you have to scream to focus so you feel awake? At times we still have to do that. You also have to balance that with not too much caffeine or sugar. Because both of those act as stimulants which can really worsen your symptoms.

Unless we have to look, we're still staying away from all news (except sports scores). You have to protect yourself. Because otherwise you'll end up with flashbacks, nightmares and more. And odds are nobody else will care.

We're getting things done. But right now it means a lot of breaks. At times it's too hard to focus. So we go for a walk or just look out the window. Another nice idea. We're slowly backing up some material and selling others. Who doesn't need extra money these days?

As you develop your network to get your content out, our suggestion is to not get caught up in comparisons. Yeah, some other person may have a bigger site, more book royalties, hot groupies, etc. But that doesn't matter.

Just focus on quality content and proper promotion. And see what happens.

We Have No Connection to Wikileaks (Moderate Trigger Day)

Just finished lunch. And then it's back to the job hunting.

Also, this. Just so it's clear, while we deal with posting anonymously, we have no connection to Wikileaks (or any other whistleblower sites). They have their niche. And we have ours.

While we stay away from news, we'll make an exception to help make a point.

Wikileaks says that they now have retained some attorneys to help their "alleged" source of the Iraq Video Clip (and documents). Is this true or not? Who knows.

But here's a key point. Julian Assange, the "head" of Wikileaks (depending on what you read) says that all whistleblowers deserve protection. In theory (and with an unlimited legal budget) that's true.

Yet, how come nobody will do the same thing for trauma survivors that come forward?

How come there's no Dept of Trauma to help these people? If you're a trauma survivor, you're well aware of what the bureaucracy can do to you.

We don't know how to deal with you.
Limited state and govt. funds.
It's a federal law that if a crisis center wants govt. funds, you CANNOT EVER mention guy rape survivors in your center's content.
A legal system that doesn't take you seriously.

In our corporate MSM society, if you're a celeb and you tell your story, instantly the world wants to listen to you. Then, a book and the talk show circuit. And so on.

If you're not a celeb, what do you do when 99.9% of the world tells you to piss off? You're our worst nightmare. We don't want you here. You fix this. It's YOUR problem.

We've done three radio interviews about being a guy survivor. One got the point across. The other two frankly were manipulated situations for ratings (not a MSM surprise).

If we sent in proof of our being raped, would Wikileaks publish it? There's no big name involved. No hook that the MSM can manipulate to death for profit and ratings.

Probably not.

Apparently, in this global depression something like this is way down the list. So, we keep going here to get the word out.

Memo to Julian Assange. If you're reading this, trauma survivors deserve to be heard as well.

We Can't Explain It (High Trigger Day)

What's going on? Today is a High Trigger Day. For those of you who are new to this system, it's kind of like smog alerts for a major city.

Everywhere you look, there are countless examples of dangerous triggers that could potentially make you symptoms unbearable (depending on where you are in your healing).

The idea seems to be this. Those with power will do and say almost anything to maintain it. They might say to you, yes, we want to know what you think. But in reality, they don't.

These get analyzed to death. But the problems keep right on going.

Why are they allowed to continue? We don't know. And right now, do you really want ANOTHER "in-depth analysis" book for $29.95?

Unless you have to look at it, if it's a threat, turn away. If you stop reading/watching/listening, you can do that anywhere. It doesn't mean you have to march in the streets and get arrested. And then potentially lose your job in this horrible economy.

In this global corporate economy, cutting into the profit margin is the most effective way to get their attention. And since the competition between various progressive groups is as fierce as ever, you may have to do this by yourself.

One key? Make your tactics become "news". Then, in the MSM (and much of the progressive that's copying them), suddenly it becomes "news". Then, they have to actually do their job and cover it.

It's sad that it works this way. But apparently right now it does.

It's a dog-eat-dog world these days.

What Time Zone are You In? (Today is a Moderate Trigger Day)

Did you know that there are 24 hour happy hours worldwide? Clever bit of marketing from some gigantic brewery that would love to have us mention their name here. But we won't.

Thanks for the global support. Next question. Since we are a global PTSD blog, do we have any connections to Wikileaks? No. Two totally seperate niches.

The only common link would be is if their sources were also trauma survivors. Which (based on their leaked material) could be a wide range of things. But we are seperate.

Some good news. It turns out we won't be homeless again. We managed to get a loan which will allow us to stay in our current apt. And stay in the middle of a large, unnamed city with lots of everything.

We still have symptoms, anger and trouble focusing at times. We fight really hard to keep our balance. Despite that, we still have trouble at times with hyperawareness. Do you have the same thing?

Not to trigger you. But how are you coping in your part of the world? Our audience ranges from large to occasionally small areas. Which means the usual mix of traffic james, job stress. And maybe homeless people at intersections.

We've been homeless twice. And when we see these people, we try not to judge. Instead, we just turn away or act like we're talking on the Blackberry. Why? Because that's better than blacking out from horrible flashbacks.

As for other sick things in the world, we just stay away (unless we have to look at it). It's like you're the only one who knows everything that's going on. The rest of the world is about 4 steps behind.

Do you stay and put up with it? Or, do you turn it off?

We find it's better to not look/watch/read/listen. Your time is valuable. So why subject yourself to the same old rubbish that you know might make you dissociate?

At times, we turn it all off and just go for a walk. Or, look out the window and enjoy the quiet. Otherwise, we have horrible nightmares and lucid dreams.

You have to protect yourself. In the process, it may be hard to know who you can trust. But really, despite what others might say and do, nobody else will do it in the end for you.

Do you ever black out while driving? Do you feel like you're going to snap in two? At times we do.

Do you still have crippling despair? How do you cope with that?

Feel free to post a comment.

How Do You Protect Yourself?

It really is Monday. And, it's a high trigger day.

Anger and dissociating are tough to deal with. Also, various triggering people who don't know when to back off.

How do you protect yourself in that situation? Do you sit and take it because they have the right to say and do anything they please? Or, do you politely get up and leave?

Lately, we're running into various people that don't know when to back off. It seems like no matter how many times you say, please stop talking about this they just keep going.

Our attitude now? If they don't stop, then leave. Don't sink to their level and then have to apologize later. Just leave.

How many people will admit that you exist? Now, how many of these people will suddenly stop triggering you? Maybe not a lot.

Which means you have to protect yourself at all costs. Unless it's your boss, odds are you can walk out of it. If you have to, you don't owe them any explanation. Why? Because you're not resposible for what they say and do. You cover your side. And then leave.

How many times a day do you have this happen to you? Do you walk away? Or, do you just sit and take it because you just do?

We refuse to do that. We deserve better. And we think that you do too.

Really Trying to Keep Our Balance(Contains Graphic Content that may be potentially triggering)

How's your weekend? Here, trying to focus and take things in tiny segments.

Anger and other symptoms are still there. Not always, but at times we feel like we're going to black out. You try to deep breathe and other stuff. But you're also feeling like you're going to black out. What happens then?

The anger and frustration of feeling like the whole world could care less is still there. There's still no new therapist here. Almost all of the support here is geared towards battered women. If you're a guy survivor, people literally say you freak us out. We don't know what to do with you.

How are you supposed to answer that?

We try to stay away from all triggers as much as possible. The immediate "family" we only talk to if needed. Because frankly it's a really unfair standard. On the one hand you hear, we love you. We care about you. But then the indirect message is don't ever f*****g talk about this stupid ass guy survivor s**t. F**k that. I have no time for that. You fix it.

How do you reply to that?

One way is to say you can't have it both ways. Yes, it would make life easier to not have to deal with your worst f*****g nightmare in your face. But you can't say you're concerned and then say f**k off at the same time. You don't treat people like that.

We're not responsible for what others do and say. Also, we don't want to spend all of our time dissociating and being burned out, cynical and pissed off. We choose to go in a positive direction.

Why? Because it hurts too f*****g much to do anything else. We don't want to waste our life on something that will never happen.

How are your multiples and little kid? How do you reassure them when you need to?

On the bad days, there's lots of anger and frustration. Our fight-or-flight mechanism is still stuck. At times we still think about killing ourselves. But we won't do it.

If we have to, we walk out of a triggering situation. We politely ask the other person(s) to please stop doing that. If they don't stop by the third time, we get up and leave. Why? Because we deserve better. If they won't stop (for whatever reason), that's their problem.

You have to protect yourself.

The Pitch (Today is a Moderate Trigger Day)

Happy Friday. Ever wonder if this is a registered trademark? And if it is, how much is the licensing fee to use it? Just curious.

Time now for our Non-Annual No Money Pledge Drive. As you know, we're not like all those other progressive sites in many ways:

No Pay pal donation button
No gift shop
No requests for used items
No CD's, DVD's, or future New York Times Bestsellers to push

You get the idea.

The only thing we have here is free information (that's hopefully helpful). We never intentionally try to trigger anyone. But as we all know, on those bad days it's hard not to.

As far as we know, we're the ONLY blog on the Net that's doing this for a global audience.

What do we ask in return? If you like what you read here, please link us everywhere it will help someone. Nothing personal. But the MSM (and almost all of the progressive) want nothing to do with us. Why? It could take all day to speculate.

Instead, let's do this. If it's not going to hurt you in any way, please link us everywhere you can. We're now read in 16 countries. We don't keep track of contact information. But we know you're there.

Think of us as a smaller version of Wikileaks. It's an anonymous way to get your message out. And to post comments when necessary.

Our suggestion? Use your tools in most creative way possible. And, protect yourself at all times.

Time to Multi-Task (Moderate Trigger Day)

How much can you do in one day? We finally caught up on our sleep. And now today is a no-news day (except for tonight's NBA Game 7).

Just covering the bases. And keeping in mind we're not responsible for what others say and do.

Like Tony Benn says, keep your self control.

A Nice Sunny Day (High Trigger Index)

Sunny and muggy as we write this. Then again, that's way better than shoveling snow anytime.

How's your day? We're still staying away from all triggers as much as possible. If there's some national emergency (ex., the Taliban attack the West Coast), that's one thing. But short of that, you really have to be careful.

One reason? We live in a corporate society. Now you can debate the pros and cons of that all day long. And if you get a book deal out of it as well, more power to you. Yet, since that's a key element, another side of it is protection.

In our experience (as a trauma survivor), you have to really try trust your intuition. And if you have that "Executive Producer" intuition (we know everything that's going to be said. How it will be said. When it will be said. And the screaming heads that will fake a "debate" over it), trust it and stay away.

Why should you do that (unless you have to do it for your job)? Because nobody else will. And two, despite all the nice messages from said MSM saying we want your comments, the truth is they don't.

Therefore, are you completely powerless? No you're not.

Here are a few tips that help us:
If you have a bad feeling about it, don't read/listen/or watch it.

If there's nothing good anymore to watch on regular TV, cancel that half of your cable. Stick with only online.

If the same thing happens with a newspaper, why buy it?

If you feel like you're bombarded with triggers when going into a store, stay away. Refuse to be a part of their profit margin. Unless of course you work there.

If you have the time and the resources, set up your own network to get your message out. There's tons of stuff out there that tell you about 1,000 ways to set up a site and get hits.

We'll boil it down to two things: quality content and promotion.

Since we all know there's so much sameness online, why be a part of it? Make yourself stand out from the (fill in the blank with a really big number)other sites and blogs out there.

Another tip. Don't fall into comparison traps. If you know you have quality material, word will get around. We have readers now in about 16 countries. Are the MSM or progressive media picking us up? No.

But that's ok. Why? Because we're putting out information that needs to be heard. Yes, marketing will always be a part of anything (to an extent). Despite that, just keep your focus.

And keep in mind, you're not responsible for what others say and do.

Have a nice day.

Keep Your Focus (High Trigger Day)

Working to keep our balance. One new thing to try: flaxseed. It's supposed to help your body to raise your seratonin level.

What do you use these days? Still covering lots of bases and trying to keep things in small segments.

Back to the email.

Still Keep Your Self Control (High Trigger Day)

How's your Monday? Other than sports scores, we don't know what's going on today. So ask somebody else :).

Still staying off additives, salt and sugar (as much as possible). And withdrawl is rough. Lots of anger and fighting to not black out. Is this a flashback or not? Is this real or not? You try all of the usual grouding technqiues. And on those bad days if they don't work, what do you do THEN?

Really trying to take things in small segments. Job hunting, trying to get a loan. Can we keep the apt. or not? How much do we sell (if we have to)?

Be very careful right now. There are a LOT of triggers.

Lots of Trauma Flooding out (Contains Graphic Content)

It's a World Cup weekend. The States and U.K. played to a 1-1 draw. The U.K. fans can't believe they didn't win. The Stateside MSM trashes soccer UNTIL the World Cup. Then, it's the "greatest game in the world". We are naturally superior in everything. And so on...

How are your symptoms these days? Today there's more backed up anger, lucid dreams. And sometimes you turn everything off and just look out the window. We fight really hard to not black out. And sometimes we're so exhausted that we think we will.

But you don't have that luxury. We go out and sometimes we hide in a bathroom and scream to try and focus again. You're in a crowded store and THIS CLOSE to snapping. Is everyone around you a psycho rapist that wants to kill you? Probably not. Yet, how do you not snap when you talk to someone and have lucid dreams about them trying to rape and kill you?

We're still fighting to keep our balance.

Trying for Some Balance

A rough first half of Friday. Right now, it's just sit and turn everything off.

Lots of flahsbacks, horrible lucid dreams. And the terror that nobody will listen.

Part of us know it's not real. Try the usual grounding techniques:

Pinch your skin
Use a ice cube to divert your attention
Think of combinations of other things to focus on that instead

All of these seem to be ok. But, what happens if none of them work?

You're in a crowded place, and you feel like it's closing in on you. There's nowhere to hide. You don't want to snap. You don't want to black out.

How do you get out of this?

Turn everything off. Just go for a walk. Look out the window. If you can focus, meditate for a while.

Do any of these work for you?

Do you keep any kind of weapon in your house or on you when you go out? At times we still keep a knife in any room we're in at home. If we go out, we take a knife with us, just in case. It may be a lucid dream. But that doesn't matter. Because you have to fight back. Nobody is going to help you.

Do you still have that fear?

It's a cloudy First World Cup Friday here. But for now, a lot of stuff we stay away from.

Because nobody else will do it for you.

A Scary Day (Contains Graphic Content)/High Trigger Day

Finally feeling some balance. Today was one of those horrible days with anger and lucid dreams. We had to fight really hard to not black out. Then, we finally felt like we have some balance again.

Do you still get bombarded with body memory? Bruises and physical pain from being raped? Do you still feel terrified that you scream to fight back? And, nobody listens?

No luck in finding a new therapist. In the universal care system, the wait time is about 4-6 weeks to get in. In one sense that's a little better than the NHS average.

What works for you these days? Feel free to post your comments.

NOTE: Right now, there's lots of paranoia re: Wikileaks. Some other sites (Cryptome and WMR) are saying that Wikileaks is a CIA/Mossad/George Soros front site.

What does this have to do with trauma? Many things:

Online security
Out thinking hackers
Not getting outed (because of something that's not your fault)

Do we keep a secret database of everyone's ISP who checks us out? Do we analyze all comments to try and find out your cell number? No and no.

The purpose here is to offer free(and hopefully) helpful information. No Google ads. No Paypal link. No giftshop with every possible thing to push on you that we can think of.

Feel safe to post your thoughts here. And, protect yourself at all times.

Keep Your Self Control(Contains Graphic Content/High Trigger Day)

Finally starting to hear about getting rent/utility help. One source says that we have too much in savings. And, our current apt. rent is too high (according to the official govt. guidelines for such things). Which means back to our main source here. If he can't help us (and if another doesn't work out), what then? Either have the new job and stay in a new lease (with cheaper rent). Or, leave and go where?
At this point, we're not sure.

What helps us to stay focused? One thing is we're not responsible for what others do and say. We cover our bases. If it works, great. If not, go in another direction.

Another tip for the day. We started taking glutathione in our herbal supplement mix. And it seems to help us to focus better. We still have symptoms at times. But another benefit of it is it makes you more sensitive to additives. Which is kind of like alcoholics and antibuse. You have a little and you can't handle it. Which overall is a good thing. We'll save the rest for our future bestseller.

How's your healing these days? Do you still have nightmares and flashbacks? At times, the despair is really bad. On the other hand, we're really trying to be aware of what we eat and do to keep our balance.

If you believe in chi, try this. Walk around barefoot if you can at home and see how you feel. Or, walk outside barefoot in lots of grass. The idea is chi is everywhere. The more in-tune your body is the more you soak up. Kind of like a very expensive digital radio.

More as it happens.

Long Term Effects (Contains Graphic Content)

Watch out. Today's Trigger Index is High.

Normally here we try to stay away from being just another "the neocons suck" progressive blog. Those have their place. But we're really going for something different.

Yet, at times circumstances say every rule has an exception.

With that in mind, here are some points about trauma that need to be talked about. The location: Gaza. (If you know all of these already, bear with us).

PTSD is a coping mechanism that your body and mind use to deal with various types of trauma.
Trauma is trapped energy in different parts of your body.
If it doesn't come out in a healthy way, it will come out in other ways.
It never comepletely goes away.
If little kids are exposed to severe trauma, it can (in many cases) literally alter the chemical makeup of their body.
Add to that ongoing severe malnutrition. Also, possibly seeing others in their family killed in front of them.

Naturally this doesn't fit into nice neat MSM soundbites. And since it's far away, many MSM corporations say screw it. Too expensive. Instead, we'll use the same old boring stock footage from (fill in the blank with a stock footage agency or stringer's name). The average viewer at home won't know the difference anyway.

Imagine if the American federal govt. declared that some city with a high "potential terrorist" population was under the same blockade. How would people react?

Would they be outraged?
Would they say this is illegal, racist and other things as well?
Or, would they obediently go along with it because of course, all dark-skinned Muslims are terrorists. So what's the big deal?

The govt. tortures, kills and does even more. All in the name of "national security".

If you dare to criticize this, instantly you're labeled as "unpatriotic". If you have nothing to hide, what the hell do you care about these "terrorists"?

FYI: Currently in the States, if you openly criticize the Israeli govt., you can be sacked from your job. And legally (unless protection is specifically written into your contract, if you have one), there's nothing you can do about this.

If a potential employer found out who we are, we could be sacked. Just for using our "right to free speech." Which really isn't "free speech".

If a health provider found out we have PTSD, we would be labeled as uninsurable. Just because of something that's not our fault.

The people in Gaza can't leave. On the other hand, do you have a current passport?

Does intl. law mean something? Or not?

Have a nice day.

How Far Would You Go to Protect Yourself(Contains Graphic Content that might be triggering)

Yes, it is Monday. Also, it's a High Trigger Day.

It seems everwhere you turn, nobody cares about anything that's trauma related. Normally, we try to avoid intentionally triggering anyone. But this time we have to mention some difficult topics. If these bother you, please stop reading and come back later (if that helps).

Is lack of health care a denial of one of your basic human rights?
Why is it that many war criminals can run free in the States and get rich in the process? They say that torture is perfectly ok. And nobody touches them.
Why is it that 99.9% of the time, the MSM says "sexual assault" and not rape? Is it because rape is too harsh sounding? It's somehow easier for the general public to pay attention to (especially during dinner)?
The suicide rate for vets continues to climb. Is it possible that the male vets are killing themselves because (a) they're gay? Or (b) because they're a rape survivor? And they have nowhere to turn?
Does intl. law mean anything? Or not?
A rape survivor is a torture survivor. Yet, society won't acknowledge both women and men.
The govt. rewards some rape crisis centers ONLY IF they ONLY talk about women survivors in their printed and online content.

If you're a rape survivor (and you can't get help in your home country), can you apply for refugee status in another? The U.N. Universal Charter of Human Rights says that all people have the right to many things. One being to not have to live in terror every day. Another is the right to health treatment.

Would you emigrate to be able to get the proper help? In the States, a woman who's pregnant is denied coverage. If you have PTSD (from whatever cause), you're denied coverage. (Unless you're in one of the rare universal care programs in Boston, Houston or San Francisco).

Can you do this? Yes. It really comes down to the bureaucrats at Immigration who look at your case file.

We're not telling you to do anything. We're only talking about possibilities that might be helpful (depending on your situation).

If you literally can't get health coverage (because of something that's not your fault), do you stay in that location? Or, do you go elsewhere?

It may not look like it. But there are other countries in the world that actually support human rights. The really powerful Western ones may use the "threat of terrorism" to justify denying you your rights. Yet, keep in mind that nobody else will protect your health (both physical and mental). All trauma survivors know that the two are connected.

If necessary, would you renounce your birth country citizenship? A growing number of Americans worldwide are. One reason: they don't like dual taxation. Another? They don't approve of their tax dollars being spent on a growing number of wars.

If necessary, there are other places in the world where you can go and be happy.

Just throwing out some ideas.

The Tools are there (Contains Graphic Content)

Still into the weekend. Today is a High Trigger Day.

But also, lots of sadness and flashbacks (nobody's paying attention. You scream and fight to not fall apart. But literally no one can be bothered to pay attention). Because of something that's not your fault.

Every trauma survivor is different. We all have our own histories and healing rates.

Yet, whether you're a rape survivor in the States (guy or a woman) or a refugee in Iraq, does it feel like nobody anywhere cares? We'd like to think that there is at least ONE person that does. Yet, how do you cope when the MSM can't be bothered to notice?

You're told that the cause of your trauma isn't your fault. But, it's YOUR responsibility to deal with it. We try to do that here. And some people on a rape crisis line tell us, we don't know what to do with you. If you're a woman rape survivor in Afghanistan, what do you do when the local govt. says legally your partner can rape you anytime he wants (because you dared to say no to sex)?

We've tried many times to get some attention to guy rape survivors. Yet, the MSM (and much of the progressive) can't be bothered. Then, we said ok. We'll create our own network.

Here in the States, torture is ok. How many wars are we involved in now? Obama, Biden and Hillary all think that intl. law means nothing (unless it preserves our "vital national security interests" (money and power)).

If we're a celebrity and we talk about being raped, instantly we get a platform. If we're not, what chance do we have of getting some attention (short of this blog)?

Because of something that's not our fault. Whether you're a guy rape survivor in the States. Or a woman in Afghanistan. Or a torture survivor in (pick a Middle Eastern country).

A Public Service

Welcome to your weekend. Hope you're getting a break in more ways than one.

We're starting a new feature here called The Trigger Index. Think of it as kind of like a smog alert in a major city. This has NO connection with the "Terrorist Threat Index" from Homeland Security, MI5 in the U.K. Or any other intl. intelligence agency. The purpose is to help you cope with symptoms.

Today's Index is Really High.

Why? Because it seems like everywhere you turn things get weirder and weirder. Lots of people say they care about various serious problems. Yet, The Great Turning Point (soon to be a new BBC series?) hasn't quite happened. The cynical could say that this is a nice marketing ploy by the pundits to sell more books, DVD's, CD's and other stuff.

On the other hand, we look at it this way. If there's no reason to watch/read/listen to it, don't. That doesn't mean don't care about an issue. Instead, it's protecting yourself. And selectively breaking it down into small segments.

Stimulus overload is a common problem with trauma survivors. This means that you have to edit where necessary.

Will life go on if you go thru a day with no TV or radio? Yes.

At times, we still have nightmares and lucid dreams. We try to stick to a holistic diet, exercise and more. And yet we still have problems.

Part of it is stimulus overload. Regardless of your healing situation, you can only take so much "if it bleeds it leads" MSM mentality.

Instead of trying to censor sites (that are on a secret govt. list), how come Australia and other countries don't develop a filter to help trauma survivors? How come helping a segment of the population that didn't asked to be traumatized isn't
"a national priority"?

Answer: money and power. Is there a trauma lobbyist group in Washington? We don't know of one. Next, how do you get in to see a Congressperson to talk about guy rape survivors?

Robert Fisk, the Independent's U.K. correspondent has a good point. There's no such thing as good politicians. It's all about money, power. And maintaining control over yours (also known to some as "national security interests").

Protect yourself at all costs.

Maybe Now's a Good Time to Study a New Language?

Lots of triggers are everywhere. Which means another day of editing.

Here's a possible solution. Study a new language (and give yourself some protection in the process)? You won't understand a lot of it (depending on your fluency). However, it's less triggers to deal with.

And like they say, immersion is the best way to study languages.

Protect Yourself at All Costs. Seriously. (Contains Graphic Content)

Listening to tunes and working online. My multiples, little kid and I still talk as much as possible. The intuition is still sharp.

Today is a High Trigger Day. Think of it as a smog alert. It has stages. This does too.

It seems that right now triggers are literally everywhere you go. Which means you have to work overtime to edit everything to protect yourself. (As if you don't have enough to do already).

But all trauma survivors know that it has to be done. Nobody else will do it for you.

How much do you value your peace of mind? We're not telling you to do anything. It's just a suggestion that hopefully will help you as well.

Screen everything and ask, do we really need to see/read/listen to this? If not, don't do it. Save money and protect your balance.

If your intuition is spot-on, many times you can literally see the news lineup for the next day. And if there's no reason to follow it, go elsewhere. Unless you cut into the MSM's profit margin, they could care less what you think.

Therefore, go in a different direction. Find your own outlet to protect your balance (and ideally get your message out at the same time).

It's balance, protection. And creatively using your tools.

All of this stuff is available. It's just a matter of looking in the right places. We'd write a book on this and save everyone a lot of time. But so far, no one's offered us a advance.

And besides, do you really think we'll just give away all of our secrets because we're so nice for free? Yes, it's the economy.

Have a nice night/day/whatever.

Fighting to Focus

How's your Wednesday? Here, we're fighting really hard to not black out. It feels like ALL of the trauma in our case is coming out all at once. We try hard to focus on solid things. Yet, it's like we're getting bombarded with tons of stimulus.

Does this happen to you? How do you cope with this?