Covering lots of bases today. Also, fighting lots of dissociative moments. Where are we? How do we get some sense of balance back? We don't want to off ourselves. We don't want to get eaten alive by anger and frustration. We don't want to attack every person that we see.
Everything has to be screened. How do we get thru the next fifteen seconds? Emptiness happens and we feel paralyzed. You go thru the motions, but that's it. Or at least it feels like it.
Do you find happy moments and hold onto them with no problems? We try to. Despite that, it's a real battle to not feel like you're an outsider. You're not allowed to be a part of this. Please sit on the sideline and leave this to someone else.
We just try to protect ourselves, both online and off. It's not your job to make the rest of the world understand everything about trauma. It would make life easier if they did. If they don't, and they don't want to know, that's their loss. Not yours.