Yes, it really has been a long week. More applications, despair at times and trying to not dissociate. In our case, it's like drinking again. Do we really want to do that? No. Instead, try to do something positive.
Nightmares still happen, but there's no common theme to them. At other times, it feels like all of your fears come out all at once. You still feel abandoned and have to remind yourself, it's not our fault. If others want to say and do horrible tuff, that's their problem to deal with.
There are some moments of clarity. Then, feeling abandoned. What do we do now? One key is by having good energy flow thru your body, it seems to help in dealing with adrenalin surges and other symptoms. They don't all disappear. Instead, you have a sense of everything being connected, which it is.
Since I was raped by three psycho pedophiles, I've never had one day free of symptoms. I don't know what's it like to wake up and not have to fight all day long to keep some sense of balance. On the other hand, I know that this is a perfectly normal coping mechanism in healing.
Have a nice day.