NOTE: This blog contains graphic language, situations and "triggers" (sights, sounds, phrases, etc.) that can be upsetting and/or dangerous to PTSD survivors. If these bother you, stop reading now. Otherwise, keep going and please pass this blog onto anybody you think it might help.
I'm really getting hammered hard with symptoms today. Dissociating and physical flashbacks are especially bad. You keep telling yourself it's not real. But for some reason it keeps coming back. I talk to my multiples and little kid all the time. I tell them that yes we need to face being raped. But also, I have to do things every day. It's a problem because for so long nobody listened to them. So they still are suspicious.
Every day is so long now. Non-stop fighting despite all the holistic things I do to cope. But, it's either this or go back to pointless meds which I can't afford. What else can I do?