Sunday, January 27, 2008

Reading Between the Lines

This blog contains graphic language, cotent and "triggers" (sights, sounds, phrases and more) that could possibly be upsetting to trauma survivors. If this bothers you, stop reading now. If not, keep going. And please pass this blog onto anyone else who might benefit from it. Thanks.

These days, I have to edit everything to avoid triggers. No U.S. TV (unless absolutely necessary). No radio. All my TV news is coming from abroad. In case you didn't know, many trauma survivors have a sharp sense of intuiton. In my case, I work on sharpening mine more by doing lots of exercises. Make predictions about different things (politics, football, baseball, anything). I'm not always right. But my percentage has gone up a lot. Living abroad has also helped this too. In many other countries people put more weight on the indirect. How you phrase things, the meaning behind the meaning, and so on.

Mine's telling me that in many ways, there's going to be growing pressure here in the States on many fronts. Both parties really are going to manipulate to win at all costs. Today I read online that Bill Clinton (both Clintons?) say that Obama is the "Black Candidate." Think about that for a second. Not the decent candidate, not the most qualified candidate. But the "Black Candidate." So what do we call Hillary? The Older Shrill-Sounding Rich White Woman? The MSM thrives on hype. So it must be news. What does this mean? The Presidential race is officially whites against blacks? It's only going to get worse.

With trauma, it seems like more and more people are using trauma survivors as political points. We live in a soundbite culture. So when you talk about this, it has to be easy. Nothing complicated, because the producer will say if I don't get it, the audience won't either. When a trauma survivor tries to get help, how do they cope with this? Also, the attitude of, it's your fault. You fix it. You're making this up to get back at this other person. There are many therapists who have no PTSD training and think it's all a sham. So you're telling the rape/abuse/trauma survivor that they don't matter. If you were stupid enough to get raped, then you take care of it. How does the survivor cope with this? What do they do then? In many cases it seems like it's every person for themselves. And if you're not strong enough to clean up what's your fault, then just f**k off and die. Do I bitch about my problems all the time? No. So why the hell should I listen to you?

Overall, is this connected to the growing gap between the haves and the have nots? I think it is. If you try to shake up the system in a good way, what's the common response? This is the way it's done. If you don't like it, leave. My response: I've done that. I came back. And now it looks like I'm going out again.

I go out someplace and a see a little kid with their mom and/or dad. And I think, they look happy. How come I didn't have that? Then, fear. What happens if they get abused as well? Will anybody listen to them? Nobody listened to me. And to this day nobody listens.

And I wonder if they ever will.

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