Sunday, September 25, 2016

Sorry to Be Away

Sorry to be away for a while. But the past week has been a real struggle with body pain and trying not to violent dissociate. It's like a migrane that never goes away, no matter what you do. You don't want to have a relapse and go back to lots of salt and sugar. Burnout makes you crave those things. But I don't want to fall apart.

One of my nieces made another suicide attempt, and will be out of the hospital tomorrow. While I try to be supportive from a distance, I can't handle her pain, mine, AND the pain of the rest of the world all at the same time. It's too much. I still at times have psychosis symptoms. You have to fight back to try and keep some sense of being grounded.

No cable news. Everything has to be screened. I don't want to relapse again with violent dissociating. It only makes pain worse.

Hope you're doing okay.

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