All day, I've been struggling with what happened to Phillip Seymour Hoffman. It's sad that he relapsed and died. In his case heroin. In my case, alcoholism, pot, hash, junk food, and for a short time, soft core porn. In the past ten years, I've almost died five times.
Yet, I'm still here.
Now, I'm dealing with the long term effects of things on you. Even years after you stop a bad habit, the damage can still be there. Does it ever completely go away? Does the pain of being raped ever completely go away?
I don't know.
On really bad days when we just want to cry, we turn things off and just sit. It's scary and horrible, but what else can we do?