Lots of errands today. Also, try as positively as you can to not dissociate. There's emptiness and scary feelings of abandonment. Then again, it's not my fault. All of this is a normal survival response to a long history of abuse.
Another thing to recognize is the damage that destructive people and triggering stuff can do to you. As I keep going and stay clean, more scary realizations happen. And I didn't see this damage that was happening.
Now though, I do. It really is all connected.