How many times a day do you struggle to not dissociate? For us, it's probably still at least one hundred times a day. You can't sit back and do nothing. Which means at times you're so exhausted that you can't do anything.
Tomorrow, it's back to the hospital for three new stress tests. We try to look at it like don't worry about labels. We have health and emotional problems that we're trying to cope with as best we can. If others can't deal with thse, that's their problem.
Go to bed early tonight. Then, try getting up at 3 a.m.