Thursday, February 26, 2009

Battling Away

This blog has to do with one person's fight against horrible PTSD from being repeatedly raped by more than one person. If this bothers you, stop reading now. Otherwise, keep going and thanks for the support.

How's your day? Obama's new Budget is $4 trillion. But will we save money by leaving Iraq and Afghanistan? Noooooo. Can't piss off those defense industry corporations that gave him lots of campaign money.

I'm starting to make some money from one of my websites. But I'm still balancing that with finding the new and better job, dealing with symptoms, and more. At times I have to focus really hard to not dissociate. And to stay away from triggers as much as possible.

Does the anger of being raped always stay with you? How do you keep from being eaten alive by it? Sometimes I have to really focus so I don't vanish in lucid dreams where I kill all the m****rf*****s that treated me like s**t. If I don't, I'm afraid that I'll just snap and that's it.

How do you deal with that feeling of the world saying you don't f*****g exist? So just piss off and go away.

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