Lots of job hunting, trying to find out more about regular therapy. And now, filing a police report on the psycho pedophiles that raped me. An attorney says I have to get a police report to add to a claim for victim compensation. Then, it takes months for someone to make a decision.
Like any trauma survivor, one thing I want is a sense of validation. The other thing to bear in mind is that I'm telling the truth. No matter what happens, it's not my fault.
Showing posts with label validation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label validation. Show all posts
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Validation
Went to the psychiatrist earlier today. The biggest result? Validation that I'm doing the right things to try and heal overall. Now it's a referral to someone else and we'll see what happens there.
After that, it's a mix of validation and sadness, all at the same time. On the other hand, you do everything you have to to protect yourself. Because nobody else will do it for you.
As severe and horrible as my symptoms are, it's all a perfectly normal survival mechanism. I don't know where you are in your healing. Despite that, maybe that will help as you go along as well.
After that, it's a mix of validation and sadness, all at the same time. On the other hand, you do everything you have to to protect yourself. Because nobody else will do it for you.
As severe and horrible as my symptoms are, it's all a perfectly normal survival mechanism. I don't know where you are in your healing. Despite that, maybe that will help as you go along as well.
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Validation
Just got back from lots of errands. Now, almost time for dinner and then more posts. However, I still screen everything because weird stuff comes out of nowhere.
Almost two weeks now with little sleep at night. Maybe I should back to all-night radio?
Anger at times still comes up. One key reason? Many key people involved in my case will never be prosecuted. I can't file a criminal or civil case. The statute of limitations has run out. The Intl. Court of Justice in the Hague can't help (even though this case does involve criminal acts and torture).
What do I do now? I did nothing wrong. Others have to live with what they do and say (or didn't do and say).
Despite that, being a normal human being with normal emotions, you ask the questions. Where's my validation? Where's my sense of justice? I do exist. I didn't ask to be tortured and go thru years of horrible symptoms with no help (except from one therapist and 3 counselors). But I do deserve to be heard.
Almost two weeks now with little sleep at night. Maybe I should back to all-night radio?
Anger at times still comes up. One key reason? Many key people involved in my case will never be prosecuted. I can't file a criminal or civil case. The statute of limitations has run out. The Intl. Court of Justice in the Hague can't help (even though this case does involve criminal acts and torture).
What do I do now? I did nothing wrong. Others have to live with what they do and say (or didn't do and say).
Despite that, being a normal human being with normal emotions, you ask the questions. Where's my validation? Where's my sense of justice? I do exist. I didn't ask to be tortured and go thru years of horrible symptoms with no help (except from one therapist and 3 counselors). But I do deserve to be heard.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Balance and Validation
How's the week going? Here, it's into the new job, lots of information, and going okay.
There's also feelings of despair and abandonment for about 2 weeks now. One mantra is that it's not abnormal in any way, considering all the trauma that happened. Face it head on in the most non-threatening way possible.
It feels like non-stop detoxifying (both physically and emotionally). You cry, you turn things off and don't know what to do. Then again, just cover bases and keep your balance as best you can.
Any other ideas?
There's also feelings of despair and abandonment for about 2 weeks now. One mantra is that it's not abnormal in any way, considering all the trauma that happened. Face it head on in the most non-threatening way possible.
It feels like non-stop detoxifying (both physically and emotionally). You cry, you turn things off and don't know what to do. Then again, just cover bases and keep your balance as best you can.
Any other ideas?
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