Tuesday, May 17, 2016

Moments of Clarity

A long day of fighting symptoms, errands and trying to not black out from dissociating. Nightmares still happen. Sometimes you can't sleep. Sometimes you then get a break. But it's not really a break because they never go away. But you try to fight back and to not just fall apart.

Can you single handedly save the world? No you can't. You have days when you have to screen everything, and you can't watch/read/listen to anything. Then, it's just trying to feel safe. If I don't have to go anywhere, I stay home and just sit with a cold drink and listen to the quiet. You have to protect yourself.

Do you feel like you're about six steps ahead of the rest of the world? My intuition isn't perfect. But I do okay. The idea being the healthier you are, the more receptive you are. How's yours?

It's not your fault.
You did nothing wrong.
You have no control over other horrible people who treat you horribly.
You have to fight back.
You can't just sit back and do nothing.
Do you have days with nothing but sadness and feelings of abandonment?
How do you try to keep grounded?

You just want to feel safe.


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