Enjoying my iced tea and staying away from triggers as much as possible. The despair still hits at times. But I'm trying everything I can to cope.
Are you surviving ok? What's up in your world? Feel free to comment.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Is Vitamin D the Answer?
Went shoppinge earlier today and stocked up on Vitamn D. I heard someone talking about it and saying that it can really help balance your seratonin levels. So we'll try it and see how it fits into the rest of the herb mix.
I'm also working on the income streams. There are niches that can be filled. But it's the old content and promotion thing that has to be done as well.
Is there some herb or combination that really helps you out? If so , please post a comment.
I'm also working on the income streams. There are niches that can be filled. But it's the old content and promotion thing that has to be done as well.
Is there some herb or combination that really helps you out? If so , please post a comment.
Friday, March 13, 2009
It Really Is Friday
How's your Friday? Caught up on some new places to apply for the Day Job. The web site and other revenue streams are still being worked on.
But also, there's the anger that still comes out. At times dissociating happens and you have to fight really hard as well. Last night I was SOOOO tired. But everybody keeps saying you have to get it out in the safest way possible.
As for triggers, I'm avoiding them as much as possible. Which means a lot of quiet space. Then again, you do what you have to.
What keeps you balanced right now? Have you found any new herbs that help as well? Post your comments.
But also, there's the anger that still comes out. At times dissociating happens and you have to fight really hard as well. Last night I was SOOOO tired. But everybody keeps saying you have to get it out in the safest way possible.
As for triggers, I'm avoiding them as much as possible. Which means a lot of quiet space. Then again, you do what you have to.
What keeps you balanced right now? Have you found any new herbs that help as well? Post your comments.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
A Rough Day With Anger
Coping ok these days? More fighting anger and dissociaiting today. Also talked to the sister about the economy. And for a second I got really pissed off when she said my brother and father were "concerned" about me during this global meltdown.
What does that mean? I'll never talk to the "parents" again because there's no point. My brother will always be a clone of my father. My sister talks to me about borrowing money. After it took her 6 years to pay back $3,000. And, after she and her husband said f**k it, we don't give as s**t how f****d up you are on meds and PTSD. We'll do anything we have to to get your f*****g money. And now SHE'S talking to ME about BORROWING money? How surreal is this?
So for a second I went off on her. Basically, I was pissed off because of the above. And also the fact that NOBODY(aside from my therapist?) gives a shit. The whole world says go freak out in the corner with your weird ass symptoms. But don't EVER do it around me. And don't EVER think that someone will actually touch you and say I'm sorry you were raped. Just be a f*****g man and suck it up. What the f***'s wrong with you?
But I later made it clear that I will NEVER EVER do anything to jeopordize my balance. And if others can't deal with that, that's their problem.
Do you have rough moments like this?
What does that mean? I'll never talk to the "parents" again because there's no point. My brother will always be a clone of my father. My sister talks to me about borrowing money. After it took her 6 years to pay back $3,000. And, after she and her husband said f**k it, we don't give as s**t how f****d up you are on meds and PTSD. We'll do anything we have to to get your f*****g money. And now SHE'S talking to ME about BORROWING money? How surreal is this?
So for a second I went off on her. Basically, I was pissed off because of the above. And also the fact that NOBODY(aside from my therapist?) gives a shit. The whole world says go freak out in the corner with your weird ass symptoms. But don't EVER do it around me. And don't EVER think that someone will actually touch you and say I'm sorry you were raped. Just be a f*****g man and suck it up. What the f***'s wrong with you?
But I later made it clear that I will NEVER EVER do anything to jeopordize my balance. And if others can't deal with that, that's their problem.
Do you have rough moments like this?
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Another Rough Day
How's your anger these days? Had a rough first half. Ended up having to go out to the parking lot again and scream for an hour to get it out. It's like working out and you have to push REALLY HARD to get past that last rep. But what else can I do?
How do you cope with times like that? What helps you to get this out safely? Please pass on your comments.
How do you cope with times like that? What helps you to get this out safely? Please pass on your comments.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
The Market Goes Up. And How About You?
The market was up almost 5% today. A short term rise? We'll see.
How are your symptoms today? At times it's been tough to concentrate. But maybe now I'm getting past the worst withdrawl ones. We still feel like we're going to snap. Last night it was poring rain and we had to drive out to the empty parking lot. Then we screamed for about an hour to fight for balance and not to vanish.
How do you cope with anger like that? What helps you? I've heard some people talk about hypnosis and other tools. But right now, cost is a big problem. So any other comments would be great.
Thanks for the support.
How are your symptoms today? At times it's been tough to concentrate. But maybe now I'm getting past the worst withdrawl ones. We still feel like we're going to snap. Last night it was poring rain and we had to drive out to the empty parking lot. Then we screamed for about an hour to fight for balance and not to vanish.
How do you cope with anger like that? What helps you? I've heard some people talk about hypnosis and other tools. But right now, cost is a big problem. So any other comments would be great.
Thanks for the support.
Monday, March 9, 2009
A Lot of Anger
Fighting really hard to keep a balance. Day 5 now of no caffeine and salt. The withdrawl symptoms are really nasty. At times I want to kill everyone who gets in my way. But I refuse to sink down to these asshole's level.
Do you still have symptoms? I had to stop going to therapy for a while (due to money problems). But we can still email without him feeling like I'm ripping him off for "free therapy".
With the economy messed up, mental health is still getting cut. And some help lines are blowing people off because they're "abusing" the line.
What's "abuse"? Who's to decide what degree of dissociating (and other symptoms) qualify as OFFICIALLY being a "crisis"? That's amazing that they try to get away with this.
Back to it.
Do you still have symptoms? I had to stop going to therapy for a while (due to money problems). But we can still email without him feeling like I'm ripping him off for "free therapy".
With the economy messed up, mental health is still getting cut. And some help lines are blowing people off because they're "abusing" the line.
What's "abuse"? Who's to decide what degree of dissociating (and other symptoms) qualify as OFFICIALLY being a "crisis"? That's amazing that they try to get away with this.
Back to it.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
Posts
